Thursday, August 31, 2006
well..bcos of the demand for post, well..tink i'll write a short one nw..
Hm..as usual, at nut's place now wif ong, chongwei, shin yun n nut. Jus came back from sch after telesys paper. Tmr is my last intronet paper! swee!
Hm..Recently jus basically studying everyday. Staring at e books, but sometimes reali cant get anything in mind. Hm...tink today'spaper will flank bah..hai~ i dun wanna take supplementry paper! how~? tmr's paper i havent touched abit, and its very hard...memorising work.. hai~ duno how..now now we r stil slacking in nut's room n talking bout life. And having wars of pinching face.. -_- but nut slpin..
Hm..last nite, was jus telling alex tt i wanna smoke, den he came dwn to pass mi cigs.. cos he wif his fren, so he say shun bian.. -_- troubled him.. Thanks ar..next time reali no need ar.. But, anyway ur exams over also nothing to do, too free can send me e cigs rite? well..fine..im onli left wif 1 paper..swee!
This examination period, bonds between me,shin yun, ong, wei wei, weibin n nut became closer.. ha..so wad will happen after e exams? Well..tink we will meet at once a week, or at least once in 2 weeks bah..Hm..stil tinking if i should get a new lcd monitor..cos if i i buy means i wun have money for shopping..hai~ duno la..but definately dun tink im getting from jay..not good to kiam ppl..
Hm..kk..tts all bout e update guys.. :)
6:07 PM
Monday, August 28, 2006
hm.. Happy Birthday Shin Yun!
Today is shin yun's bday..and we took our busfund paper.. Hm..should be ok la? hope wil pass la..
Yesterday, studied whole day at nut's place, till nite time i went back home to makan, cos mom cooked ho liao.. Then went back to nut's place study till 4am. Me, nut, ong n chong wei became real shag...but keep forcing ourselves.. Um..too bad shin yun cant join us..
Well..den slept at 4+,woke up at 8+ study again. Shin yun n Wei Bin den came and join us at 10?As nut and i were smoking outside house, we met a robbery case! First we saw a malay guy, in his 20s, running extremly fast dwn e stairs, we didnt think much, den we heard a lady's voice, talking, not very loud, so we too didnt care. Then e lady was holding alot of things in her hands, she stood infront of us, saying she is being robbed. We didnt believe at first, cos is like "huh?" she doesnt seems like, and furthermore we nv imagained this kinda thing would ever happen? We went "huh?really ar?" ha..e lady den confirmed wif us tt its really a robbery..nut immediately put dwn his notes, and ran dwn e stairs. Then i ran back to nut's place n take my phone for e lady to call e police.When i went in, i told e rest bout someone being robbed, and e guys went to help, while poor shin yun gt to stand outside e house cos its not locked, and after witnessing it, of cos will scared?
Wow..this is e first time i saw tis kinda thing man. But of cos, e guy ran away, and dun tink he'll caught la..So there isnt any use to call e police also.The funny thing is i heard from e lady, e malay guy even apologised while he snatched e phone. LOL!
Then after tt, we went back n study, and we r onli left wif 2hrs? Dunno whether to consider us lucky or unlucky? bcos of e robbery case we waste e time tt should be studying..But its rare to see this kinda thing man.Well..Really it doesnt seems or look like a robbery case, cos e lady is too cool to keep still and not shout. If we happen not to be outside, we also won't noe man. She didn't shout. So a lesson being learn is to shout when u r being robbed, to alert e people around u, and there are higher chances tt e idiot will get caught.
Hm..Den after e paper, met alex n melvin for cigs, den go tamp mall kia kia, cos e bday gal wanna kia kia. :P Bought some small gifts for her, though cant give her any surprise, but hope she like it la..though its cheap. Paiseh ar..no time.. but i wu sim can liao rite? :P
Ya den after e session wif awol, went to meet alex pass him things, den balik kampong. Tonite got to rest man, tmr study at nut's place again! -_- 3 more papers! Endure!
Hm..jay is having some competition now, so let's wish him e usual phrase "GOod Luck!" though, we all know there isnt a need.
And..
TO ALEX LIU, thanks ar..dun remind me that u finished ur papers alrdy ar! you wont wanna see me lose e drive to study hor? thanks ar.. haha..
TO TAT WEE,im ok la..don't worry.. :) good to hear that u r still my loyal fans..haha..
10:37 PM
Sunday, August 27, 2006
Ok, i tried to fought, i told him, i want to face wadeva shit.But now, again anad again, everthing u said jus put me down again and again. u told me only frens, no more physical cotacts, but am i seeing? BULLSHIT. Oh i cant blame that fucking croc alecia to be so darn fucking cheap, throwing herself at ppl, practically allowing anyone to touch, goes ard touching whichever souls which IT says is GOOD FRENS. THAT IS E NATURE FOR CHEAP SLUTS. so, u can accept it, and making urself cheap too, thats ur prob, i will nv tolerate tis, and of cos, nv will i even lay a finger on my good guys frens for no reason. That is the diff between CHEAP SLUTS and me. U r definately degrading urself. definately giving me a clearer defination of wad is "not worth it".
I told u, practically turning myself into a dog.now i tink back, for u who enjoy sluts!? not worth a shit. u said how u wish i will b e one going tmr, n how u told me e other time saying for e 2nd audition, u will definately want me to go. can i ask a request from u? CAN U STOP BULLSHITTING?U THINK IM REALLY DUMB?OR U R SO CHEAP THAT U NEED SLUTS!? I dun need someone who is cheap n shits ard. Quit playing games with me.
Jus let sluts touch u all over, turn u into another cheap thing, for all i care. All i can say is, wad ever i do, at least i wont regret in e future, though i feel kinda stupid n dog after doing all these. For at least, i see it wif my own eyes, i bought a precious truth. and never will i ever do a thing for u again. So REALLY...I WONT BE UR BAIT AGAIN.
CHEAP CROCS FRENS, U GUYS ARE REALLY STUPID TO BE DECEIVED BY SUCH CHEAP REPTILE ARD U, REALLY KP ME FOR ALL I CARE, SOONER OR LATER U WILL SEE IT.
5:52 PM
Friday, August 25, 2006
She has been telling to fight for my own happiness, fight for him. But wouldnt he be jus plain blinded by my doings, and com out wif a decision that is not from within his heart? doesnt tt mean its not truthfully his decision?he is jus blinded?She tells me that there is no such thing as i wait for his decision n do nothing n jus plain wait for his return. Cos the world is cruel, n i got to be despicable.But, it wouldnt be e true outcomes from within isnt it?I only want e genuine heart, not blinded.
I cant accept the fact that he still lies to me when im back, cos e moment im back, i laid everything aside, and trusted him alot. But the fact that i noe its nothing but lies again, i reali duno wad i should do.Cos i may not be able to trust him again.
Another supported my tinking. She said jus let him think wif his heart. Follow his heart. He broke e trust again n again. And if e decision he made after me showing is not wad he really feels there is no point. And if i fought, and lies still drops by, i wil feel worst. I dun wanna get hurt, i wanna get pampered.
Until his decision is made, i really dun wanna hinder his way. But.. Well.. mayb i jus got to tink about it..dun wanna hinder his way, dun wanna disturb his thoughts of finding e things tt he reali want..But if he still remains uncertain, i will see things that i dun want, and i'l get hurt again.
He said he will return, and would not hurt me again. I'll just have to wait..just have to wait..
2:15 AM
Maybe it will be better this way.Its either all or nothing, its either me or it. Well..i duno, im not forcing u, neither am i threatening u, im jus telling u, i dun wan to be in a situation, i'd rather leave. But..But..so we'll talk again when u reali noe wad u need n wad u want. But for a better way out, its obviously not me.
Well..i'll sitting for my first paper tmr, maths 2. Well..should b ok bah..i've lately only concentrated on maths, so e rest i stil have no idea.. -_- But i dun wan to sit for supp if possible. So..hai~ though im so tired, jus cant get enuff rest, i'll stil have to push..
Read from a fren's blog, he was saying something bout "love or lust". I tink tt's a very good question for alot bah.. So i've checked out e dictionary. But its rather long..so i'll only attached part of it...
LOVE-
1.
a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2.
a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
Lust-
1.
intense sexual desire or appetite.
2.
a passionate or overmastering desire or craving (usually fol. by for): a lust for power.
3.
Obsolete.
a.
pleasure or delight.
b.
desire; inclination; wish.
Well...better understanding?hm..i tink.."life" is complicating..its jus complicated.
I hope he'll not drink so much..i hope he doesnt force himself for the answer, cos i believe, e answer will be out from within..not by force.
Just..take care..
1:07 AM
Thursday, August 24, 2006
just get tis shit off me.
just let me go.
i fucking stucked here feeling terrible.
i really dun wan to keep feeling tis way.
jus fuck off and enjoy ur life at crocs farm.
pls dun bull shit anymore.
jus dun let me feel terrible.
i find it plain useless.
i reali hate living.
Really hate all e shits.
so let go.
i dun need all the uncertainty,
i dun need all the shits.
2:08 AM
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Really thanks for that truthful reply.Finally its out from ur mouth, i noe why u r hiding, its obvious, but its either u duno it urself or u jus didnt say. Finally its out, that will do u good. Then all e best. i cant accept it though so, ya, dun appear infront of me. Pls grant me tis wish til things are ok for me. I'll excues tmr, cos its my fren's bday. So after tmr, it wil be over.
So if u want me to wish u best of luck, wait then. but i tink i might b able to in e future.Now it only makes me boil.
ya guys, i cut my hair. My new hair do is a failure though, which makes ong n gang laugh hard. No more hotties.Im sad, lately luck hasnt been on my side, but i hope it wont affect my exams. The salon at century square named "STORM" is not a gd place for hair do. So,dun go. she cut my fringe til an act cute outlook. -_- you noe? those jap kinda hair style? aRgh..
Really, bad day till now, nothing is good. I suddenly feel so sick of living. I just hate living. i like nothing bout living. i hate the world, i hate the outside world. i hate the freaking ugly side of the world. The reality is ugly, humans are ugly, i am ugly.
SO I REALLY HATE LIVING.
10:53 PM
Empty..
i wanna smoke..
jus empty..
chatting wif ong,chong wei,shin yun now..about relations..
suddenly bottled up wif..
duno hw to explain e feeling..
jus..
EMPTY
still..hate reptiles...disgusting freaks.
2:14 AM
Monday, August 21, 2006
Liquid room is really not a place to club. Its too small, n age grp is too young..well..its just reali not a nice place at all..too act-like. Um..YEsterday(sat) went to bugis to makan wif jay,jj,mei yi,ww,jh,wr,ricky,jerm,jm,shu,kai n candy. It was jHao's bday, and we went to liquid room after tt..But b4 that, i met jay at orchard den went to some wedding dinner awhile den went off to meet e guys. Hm..anyway, i will nv go Liquid Room again..I bet the grp wil also not go ther again man..
Well..i really hate crocodiles, i hate reptiles.They spoil my mood. Really..i wonder why is their skin so thick, argh! I understand that it takes 2 hands to clap, so i dun believe tt u nv said anything or done anything to make her react this way..So dun bullshit. But really, i noe i dun need to care so much. I dun have the need to let this things affect me, so i will not. i vowed here i wun kp. Read this carefully, i dun believe cos it really makes no sense. I'll keep quiet. i shant SPEAK.
I jus hope, people, pls be true to wad u r doing, how u really feel, and pls, make sense out of it. The truths always tele wif the reality i believe. So once it doesnt tele, dun try to lie ur way tru. I've seen too much ppl wif mask these days, the first one hit me hard cos its too unbelievable, and i tell u, i wont let it happen again, i wont trust anyone too easily again, i wun trust.
12:19 AM
Saturday, August 19, 2006
Wah...today is a freaking bad day! First,i got to go back to school jus to pay my school fees. I've got no lesson, and jus bcos of the freaking fees, i got to go all e way to school. I called e school, and asked if i can pay on monday n be excused, but failed. So goodness gracious me got to go back.
I stepped out of my house and could feel the burning flame from the sun.While going to school, i boarded a darn stuffy and hot bus, filled wif smelly smell of sweats. ARGH! What could be worst wif that kinda awful smell!Well..when i reached the office, there is a freaking queue of 6 to 7 people, and the queue takes a darn whole day to be my turn man. Finally after paying the fees, i make my way straight to the bus stop again and head to work. Still wif e freaking hot weather,bus no. 23 was so slow till i cant stop swearing in my heart. Then again, it came n while its in the express way, there was a heavy traffic,almost causing a traffic jam! and its on a friday afternoon 3+.Just my freaking luck!Then, i got to change bus at kallang, still i have to wait for bus no.65 under the freaking hot burning sun for so darn long!I got to start work at 4,and at 3.40 i jus boarded e bus.I havent eaten anything since morn, and i wont have tiime to eat! So i request to star at 5.Rachel was kind enough to allow. Yea,and in order to make myself feel happier, i ordered something nice or myself. Its a omelette rice wif japanese curry and cutlet. Well..i heard its nice, and it looks appealing too. But it turns out not really impressive. Argh!cant even allow myself to enjoy a decent meal. I really don't know is it bcos im too suey, or is it the freaking chief is jus plain lousy.
Enough of all the bad lucks, but its really nv ending.Once i started work, i had a terrible terrible headache! and sales were really bad.for 3 hrs, i only sold 5 bottles? for your info, i am suppose to work 6 hrs, and the target im suppose to hit was 24bottles. -_- But thankfully i managed to over hit in the end with the help of rachel and that 3 female customers,if not for them,i would only jus merely touched the target.which means there won't be any commision for today.
Then after work, met val n jj.Cos val needs to borrow my ic, in order to borrow books from the national library. Then we talk cock awhile,den they headed to cck,and i went back home.And yea, the freaking terrible heaache stayed wif me for the whole damn day, and its still with me now.
There's a saying, "Lang suey,qi jiao bian kong guey" very true. Guess wad, while im blogging now, im filled wif anger. why? bcos my fucking com is so freaking laggy, till i type finish a sentence, the sentence still not out yet.Have to wait for like 7 seconds then it will appear. Get it!?
12:51 AM
Friday, August 18, 2006
Lee Sheng Jie can sings well! well..he came to TP for a mini concert, and ya,he can sings well..groove and his jia ying is good. although,well..he is not good looking. u might b thinking im kinda er xin y i go for tis kinda concert,but well..its free! and jus wanna see his singing in live can make it or not.. haha..So..ya,he is good.
Hm..today in class, we get to see the tv commercials and listen to our radio commercials. Well..im happy wif my grp's tv commercials, wif hottie's perfect expression,im proud to say that our commercial is kind of success, alot commented well.. :) and my role as a fairy hot mother was also commented by nut..haha.. :)
Jus came back from tampines,was wif ong n gang. talking about "LIFE". And as usual, our frequent topic, a couple(ben n reginA) in our class who is so fake n all..well..now, when i see them, i really feel kinda pissed, cos of their looks and actions. i really cant stand people being so fake..everything they do, seems to have alot of motive man. now i kinda understAnd wad kinda ppl i should take precaution wif in e working society, she gives me the idea man. yes,its a she.She likes backstabbing and acting i assume. Remember i was refering to a couple? so, the HE is someone who thinks highly of himself, jus bcos his family is quite well to do i heard. he speak without thinking, and jus utter rubbish that will definately offend ppl. and once he got together wif her, he totally forgotten about friends that once shares memories wif him, and they stick together like glue. and the worse shit is, once i asked him "you didn't join the gang of guys alrdy hor?" he jus replied "wad for?" I really wanna give him a tight slap. Really..this 2 person ought to b together, they are two horrible creatures. i've got 4 letters for them-YUCKS.
i feel kinda sick wif my blog skin,its so not cool. but am lazy to search and change leh..hm..someday whn im reali bored, that's when i'll change bah.
2:07 AM
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Um...today is tiring~! reached school at 935, lessons till 12. Then,met jack n alex for ciggs,den makan. the tiring part was,i practiced my maths, den went to see donald duck, do maths. Hottie was telling me about his maths lecturer last sem, saying he teaches well,n ask mi to see him if i need any help. After which i found out the lecturer he was talking about is donald duck! Well..donald duck reali teaches well! :) Ok,so i studied, practice,blah blah till 5! Why 5!? cos got to meet hotties and gang for our filming. Haha..the filming was fun! but tiring after the whole day of studying n stuff..
But still..the effort is worth it! the commercial was baik! well..still room for improvement though, but aiya..too tired to make it a better one. Anyway its the last assignment, and jus get it over and done with la..
Um..school is coming to an end, which means exams is in just 1weeks time! And regine is still dwelling, not doing any shit besides practicing on her maths. Well..guys, its really not my fault,i got alot to attend to, my assignments and work. But yea,tml she can do more on her maths.
*Yawn! i hope i can pass all my modules man..n no need for any supp..hope la.. -_-*
Well..im happy wif my life, i got frens that cares and loves me, got mom n sis that loves me more dearly, and even lecturers that are willing to do more work then wad they need to, jus to help me. I dun have to worry about anyone, dont have to worry bout almost anything (xcept 4 exams). Well..i should feel blessed bah.. =)
After exam...
- clubbing
- shopping
- suntan
- malaysia
- chalets,bbq
- BLEACH~!
11:47 PM
hm..wad have i done recently? saturday i was working at taka for 12 hours! and the sales target to hit is 59bottles! Gosh! and ya..i hit jus nice,so no commisson.. -_- so gotta go back when im free to earn more! den went MINDS wif jay,meiyi n jj. Well..nice gaming session.. :)
Anyway, i didnt go sch today,cos almost all e lessons finish le..n i went shopping wif mommy! wahaha..i bought alot of stuff man..well and cause mom to "vomit blood". 2 shoes,few tops,2 bottoms,n a bag. Well..its actually not alot,but cos its shopping wif my mom,its consider alot alrdy! 1st time shop wif mom,she nv kpkb.. :D happy! enjoyed myself shopping wif her today! Thanks mom! though u obviously doesnt read my blog. =P
Hm..yea den jus now actually planned to meet jay, but he jus finished his soccer n he niam di di niam gao gao,so n lazy,so didnt. So went hungry at 11+, n alex planned to go 85 wif his fren for la kopi session,so i joined..hungry hungry.. so talk cock awhile den balik kampong!
Um..tml lesson starts at 9,so goin off to bed soon... hm.. exams in jus another a week plus..
DIE die...
2:48 AM
Friday, August 11, 2006
Um...have been very busy lately..i've done quite a few activities for the past few weeks, ha..then was so enthu to put it up,but was held up wif my projects again,didnt even have time to blog. So now its not very fresh alrdy..well..i'll roughly tell u guys?
hm..Been to JB wif jay and ma william, ha..and jay bought me a vespa necklace! its very cute man..whn u guys see me next time, u will see it.. i wanna get my bike licence and ride a vespa! ha! hm..den we got some clothes,and eat wujipalia..nice place i should say! though its not as clean as singapore, but its a nice experience.. :) i enjoyed myself.. hm..wad amases me is that ppl can actually smoke in the shopping centers after a certain time! when i saw 2 guys lighting their ciggs, i was amased and kinda embaressed myself, i spoke kinda loud and ask jay "HERE CAN SMOKE ONE MEH!?" ha..i feel like a dumbo.. so the next thing i do is to light a cig too.. :P
hm..was rather busy wif my projects, though so, i didnt forget to enjoy a little.. few days back,went to esplanade wif my classmates to look at the fireworks..well..kinda stupid huh? its not impressive anyway..think they running low on their budget..so many days of fireworks..ki siao. anyway,i didnt reali wanna go tt day,cos i have projects and more PROJECTS. but didnt wanna disappoint them cos its a group kinda thing. so..went and as expected, i saw crowds.. -_- i hate it to see so many ppl,cos i gt to squeeze like those kiasu ppl does. As i say,e crowds are scary,too much ppl.. so didnt reali enjoyed tt much,e crowds spoils my mood. :P hm..den me and e gang find some place to "talk about life", however, we ended up talking bout ppl we noe.
Oh ya..i'm now having a part time job at taka,the baby fair. im promoting for GAIA, some baby shampoo and stuff..its actually ideal for eczema skin,sensitive skin like mine..ha..so im goin to purchase them!i tink i would definately need them..my skin is getting from bad to worse.. Blame me for being lazy,cos i didnt apply my med. :P
Well..after so long,i finally finished my projects! though there is still one more assignment in hand. And my presentation was quite ok! :) well...reali gotta thanks alex,cos he enlighten my work i should say,he helped me to do my work for busfund. if not for him,i tink i got more more things to do? :D thanks ar! he is a good fren indeed! Well i got so busy till i dun even have time to jus peep at my blog till today, and also not able to catch my addicted anime "bleach". Argh~ though im done wif projs, i stil got my exams coming in 2 weeks! SHIT!
What more can i ask for..i got a bunch of truthful friends around me..my classmates,LJboys gang, zi ming,alex,wei li,xiong,jay n gang, and good girlfriends like meiyi,shellen n celine! ha..im fortunate! happy that im out of that pile of shit! :P
Well..jus let me enjoy today, watch my anime and later meeting shellen for dinner..after today,i'll slog cos tml gt work,den sun also work,n study.. MATHS is killing me! Well..got to rush for my anime! :D
4:56 PM
